Edited version of On Being Me- Published Dec 1, 2015
“The surest way to lose your self-worth is by trying to find it through the eyes of others.” Becca Lee Coco Calla
My love of reading took hold at age 12. I can remember using a flashlight under the covers long after my mother had told me firmly, “lights out“. I had an insatiable appetite for novels in the vampire’s genre at the time. Escapism books that my pre-teen mind found appealing. Thankfully a couple of years later a teacher assigned the novel “the Crystal Cave” by Mary Stewart and my intense obsession with Merlin, Arthur, and Camelot began. I still own that series but none of the vampires stories. As I grew, so did my passion to read anything in the Fantasy genre. My happiest memories in high school were when I volunteered to dust the school’s “stacks” in the book closet before summer vacation. Oh what a feast for my mind!
It was, at age 16, when my friend’s mother said she would love to read my memoir around age 40 as she was curious how my story would unfold, after my violent upbringing, that my desire to write seized my mind and has been relentless ever since. This planted a seed that began to germinate but I refused to allow it to nurture and grow until I was ready to drop the fear of what other people would think of my story. I no longer fear the rejection of others because I now know where my power comes from. That is to say…I know where that power comes from for all of us. And as I master this mindset, I lighten up about what others think. It is just a case of relaxing just enough to allow a new thought to take hold in me, feel the truth of it and then act. Then another thought, feel how that one feels and so on. I can summon this power any time I want and I wish this awareness to be gifted to everyone. You can control how you think, feel and react at any given moment.
If I had to sum myself up into 3 words, those words would have to be: conscious, curious and grateful. Why those words? In short, because now I can see evidence of an energy that is unfolding and expanding as I make everyday conscious decisions, almost minute by minute. I am curious to find out how as we cross paths with muses and mentors, that the kaleidoscope of life will keep shifting and shaping. Grateful because I have allowed myself to embrace and hone my gifts as an intuitive, empathic human being and use this ability in all areas of my life now.
I love to research things that mystify me and formulate my thoughts in written form. I am inspired by quotes and collect them like some people collect kitchen gadgets to use “someday“ when the right occasion presents itself. I hope the seeds I scatter along the way in my writing will take hold in the reader and grow into something that illuminates a new thought and that thought becomes a desire. I am fully aware that some of my thoughts are subversive, but they are meant to be. I love to banter and exchange new thought provoking conversation as long as it is kind and respectful to all.
I am so grateful to have opportunities to share my views of the world in the form of words. I hope you will leave me a comment after reading my articles as this is the reader’s opportunity to review my work and let me know if it is a hit or a miss. I look forward to reading all the comments and growing in my ability to inspire and delight. I am dedicated to the journey to open hearts and minds.
What inspires you?